My roommate is such a bitch.

The dirty, Mac-n-Cheese bowl.

    I'm just going to take some time right now to bitch about my hideous, loud, annoying roommate, Chloe. I actually call her Chode or Chodey behind her back. She is such a bitch. While I'm gone during weekends, she goes through my closet and takes my food. I had a four pack of shells and cheese and she ate all four.. That's not even the worst part about my lack of shells and cheese. She left the packaging in my closet; maybe she thought I wouldn't notice the actual food was gone if she left the cardboard package in there? Gah, what a bitch.
     Also, my UNDERWEAR, my PANTIES, my CHONES (MY PERSONAL UNDERWEAR THAT WAS IN MY UNDERWEAR DRAWER!) was out of my drawer and on the floor under/near my desk. WHAT THE HELL? In addition to eating my shells and cheese, she also ate my four/five dollar, delicious salsa, my chips, and brewed/drank all of my Yuban. Keep in mind, I left her a note before i left specifically saying to not eat any of my food and for her to wash my bowl that she had used FOUR DAYS prior. I know she read the note, because when I came back, she had washed the macaroni & cheese crusted bowl.
    I have told her to buy me food, but I haven't said anything about my underwear being messed with. I'm not even sure how to approach her about that.

My precious Yuban that Chodey brewed/drank.

    Another thing: she Skypes her parents (Really, your parents, Chodey? Your parents? Like you didn't get enough of them the past eighteen years?) every night until 2 or 3 in the morning. And I'm sure most of you are saying to yourselves, "Oh how cute, she misses her parents." But do not be mistaken! She's more of a bitch to them than she is to me. She calls them douche bags, bitches, dicks, motherfuckers, etc. She says, "I'm going to hang up because you're annoying me" every ten minutes. She complains about having to "study" all of the time. (When in reality, she's getting trashed and high every weekend. Seriously, the first thing she told me when I got back was, "Oh, I fucked this guy, Miguel, this weekend." Who says/does that? Chodey does; that's who.)
    God, I swear, I just want to beat her with a bar of soap in a tube sock. Any ideas? I should probably talk to the RA about this and see what he says. What do you think?