Thursday, October 6, 2011

The worst laugh in the world.

Chode used my bowl again today & didn't wash it.
Have you ever heard the sound of a hyena? Yes you have. What about the sound of a loaded machine gun while fired? I'm sure you have heard that one too. Okay, now imagine if those sounds had a baby. Now mix that baby with some questionable sex noises and you get Chode's laugh. (If you're a recent follower/reader, this is where Chode is introduced.) I've heard some pretty awful laughs, and seen some pretty people who transform into hideous people when they laugh, but Chode tops them all. I didn't even know such an awful laugh or ugly laughing face existed. Her laugh would win a gold medal at the "Atrocious Laugh" competition at the Hideous Habits Olympics. It makes me want to vomit in my hands. You see, I don't ever know what her random bursts of machine-gun-hyena-sex are about - something on her laptop - because I tend to keep as far (8 feet is basically as far away I can get) away from her as possible. I'm really hoping she's laughing at some television show she streams online or watching a movie she has, and not the raunchy alternative. I'm not going to be the inquisitive one; I'll let someone else on my floor knock on our door and ask why she's making ambiguous sounds so late at night. All that being said, Chodewick's laugh isn't nearly as bad as her late-night Skype conversations with her parents in Japanese. Apparently her father understands it, but her mother doesn't. (Yeah, I've listened to enough of Chodey's conversations to know her whole life story; it's unreal.) When Chode is only talking to her mother via Skype, she will apparently utter obscenities in Japanese to her and then proudly (and loudly, as always) announce, "I love how I can tell you off in Japanese and you don't know what I'm saying."
Real mature, Hodey. 
Go play in traffic.

So.. I bought some chips today. Chode ate them.
Oh, it's on like Donkey Kong.

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